Sunday evening I was scrolling through Facebook and what I noticed was a million posts (okay, about 25) on perfection.

Look at “my perfect day at the park,” “the perfect child,” “the perfect weekend,” “the perfect dinner,” “the perfect husband” and “the perfect career.” They were not only pretty photos expressing joy. What struck me was the overwhelming use of the word “perfect”.

Really?! Having a good day was not enough? It had to be perfect. Are their lives really that perfect? Or are they actually feeling so miserable that they need to pretend and prove otherwise on social media?

I felt the pressure to post something. But I had nothing. I had a pretty good weekend. I wrote a lot, which I love. I connected with my awesome Facebook community and clients. I hung out with my partner, whom I love and always enjoy hanging out with. I read a good book. I went for a run. I enjoyed the sun. I went to the farmer’s market and got some amazing strawberries. Sounds great, right? Nothing spectacular, but it is all good stuff.

It was also the weekend before my father’s funeral.

I realized that getting back into running after being off with a broken toe will take a while. I had some tummy aches. And I kept forgetting to cut my nails (annoying). So there you go. My weekend wasn’t perfect afterall.

So I posted this on Facebook: “Reading about 20 ‘perfect weekend’ FB updates is giving me pressure to tell you how perfectly perfect my weekend was… Baby geese during my run were a highlight. There you have it”.

I received many likes and comments about other people’s also average or good, but not perfect weekend.

So if others are not having such a perfect time either, why is the need to post about perfection? What is perfection anyways? Does perfection even exist? Why do we have this urge or pressure to make everything so perfect on Facebook? Why are we being shunned upon by negative posts?

When will realize that Facebook posts are not everything? A positive post doesn’t mean a perfect or even a happy life. A negative post doesn’t mean an unhappy or unworthy life. No, posts don’t mean not having a life.

“If it’s not on Facebook, it’s not true” is a big lie. There is so much beyond Facebook. It can be a lot of things or something or nothing, but it is never everything.

Please know that when I post beautiful travel pictures, personal stories about my healing journey, fun photos of my day, inspiring articles and motivational pictures, it doesn’t mean my life is perfect. It simply means that I had something nice to share. It means that I want to inspire you. It means that I want to inspire myself. It means that I want us to find further strength through a beautiful moment.

Please know that if I post something sad, questioning, angry or negative it doesn’t mean that I am a party-pooper and my entire life sucks. It doesn’t mean I can’t find the simply joy in life. It simply means that I needed let some air out. It means I needed to be heard. Perhaps it means I needed to be hugged, not “liked” or pitied with an “I’m sorry,” but rather cared about.

Please know that when someone posts only positive things and even claims perfection, it doesn’t mean that their life is perfect. It may mean that they just want to share what made them smile. It may mean they want you to smile. It may even mean that they are more lonely, more depressed and in more pain that you can ever imagine and they simply need these inspiring quotes and beautiful photos to get them through another day. They may need it to find hope.

Please know that when someone posts negative things it doesn’t mean they want to bring you down. It may mean that they simply need to share their pain. It may mean they are having a tough time and this is their way of release. It may mean that they don’t know any other way to be but in pain. It may mean that it is just a phase, a phase of tough times. It likely means they need your love.

Please know that if someone is not posting all the time, disappears or not even present ever at all, it doesn’t mean they don’t care or don’t lurk. Yes, they may not care much for social media or have no access to it for a while. They may have self-control or better things to do: more power to them. But it may actually mean that they feel like they are not worthy of posting; they may feel that their life is not spectacular, not happy, not fun and not perfect enough to share.

Please, ask how they are.

~

Author: Kat Gal

Editor: Alli Sarazen

Photo: StartBloggingOnline.com