1 Chipotle Steak Burrito = 3 hours, 40 minutes of sex.

Via Waylon Lewis
on Nov 18, 2010
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How does your favorite Chipotle meal weigh in?

Update: How many calories is your favorite Chipotle meal? Click here to find out:

At Chipotle, How Many Calories Do People Really Eat? Most meals have more than 1,000 calories and almost a full day’s worth of sodium.”

chipotle calories

Click above for more meal options.


One way to offset: 1 Chipotle Steak Burrito = 3 hours, 40 minutes of sex.

However, a vegetarian Chipotle burrito (with organic rice, props!) only requires 2 hours and 15 minutes of sex. Which is sadly ironic, since healthy vegetarians are the ones who can easily “go” for soooo much longer, compared to you fatty steak-eating boys.

Click below for more at Daily Beast:


About Waylon Lewis

Waylon Lewis, founder of elephant magazine, now elephantjournal.com & host of Walk the Talk Show with Waylon Lewis, is a 1st generation American Buddhist “Dharma Brat." Voted #1 in U.S. on twitter for #green two years running, Changemaker & Eco Ambassador by Treehugger, Green Hero by Discovery’s Planet Green, Best (!) Shameless Self-Promoter at Westword's Web Awards, Prominent Buddhist by Shambhala Sun, & 100 Most Influential People in Health & Fitness 2011 by "Greatist", Waylon is a mediocre climber, lazy yogi, 365-day bicycle commuter & best friend to Redford (his rescue hound). His aim: to bring the good news re: "the mindful life" beyond the choir & to all those who didn't know they gave a care. elephantjournal.com | His first book, Things I would like to do with You, is now available.


17 Responses to “1 Chipotle Steak Burrito = 3 hours, 40 minutes of sex.”

  1. Waylon's gaylover says:

    Yeah, waylon, you can suck dick longer when you eat steak. U'r such a douche!

  2. Waylon's gaylover says:

    and u'r e-mag is going to sag like your balls do if you keep writing this garbage.

  3. Nye says:

    Granted you ARE entitled to your opinion, but insulting certain groups of your readers? Not the best way of converting people to the idea of vegetarianism.

    Not all who eat meat are fat, and many are quite athletic and have much endurance. Look at the paleo diet and the Crossfit Games for example. Most who compete are Paleo eaters.

    Diets need to be tailored to the individual. Vegetarianism is not right for everybody, just as eating meat is not for everybody.

  4. Nye says:

    That is not being constructive.

  5. Dan Slanger says:

    Hi Alice,

    Does 'dislike' mean you wish burritos were not so calorie-dense or, as with Nye below, you wish bloggers were not so quick to jest (about eating steak and being overweight)?

  6. Dylan says:

    Wow. This is, uh, Interesting…

  7. PjB says:

    Here's a constructive criticism: EJ's pages take way too long to load.

  8. Seal says:

    So you have 3 hours and 40 minutes of sex with yourself? Cause your website is nothing but self masturbation. *Jerk* *Jerk*… I'm a vegan (props) *jerk*jerk* green buddhist bicycler…. AHHH. But seriously though I hate the self promotion behind "ecofriendly" pompous vegan a-holes… you're killing the cause.

  9. […] they did by City, my town (Boulder) would go for Chipotle burritos, New Belgium beer, and skinny organic soy […]

  10. waylonlewis says:

    C'mon, Jay, you're one for the sarcasm and wit…that was how I meant it. Obviously millions of animal murderers are in great shape!

  11. waylonlewis says:

    Thanks, anonymous. Write something for us, show me the way…'cause obviously I've offended and I don't want to keep hurting the cause. Email us if you'd like to contribute.

  12. Beefeater says:

    Waylon, I've known you for a while and I've always thought you were a tool but I think you have cemented that opinion in minds of myself and many others I know around Boulder and Denver. Seal, "self masturbation" is about the best description I can think of for his posts. Next time I see you in class I will make sure flick some of my beef sweat your way and see if you freak out… Cheers mate.

  13. […] covered this sort of 9/12 weeks calculus before. But we can always do so again, and again, and again, and […]

  14. eatmeatson says:

    Yo go to epicmealtime.com and shut these vegetarian anti-meat bitches the fuck up

  15. jotartare says:

    My libido and endurance are way healthier on paleo than back when I was a vegetarian eating all those "healthy grains" and not enough fat and protein.

  16. Sam Dio says:

    I eat meat, rarely, but I do eat it. I support vegans and vegetarians and anybody who makes healthy life choices, in general.

    1. Assuming that it's men that eat meat = rude, borderline misogynistic

    2. I'd like to see citations for the sex drive of vegetarians VS meat eaters (Seriously, I'm genuinely interested)

    3. Condescending to people who make choices you might not agree with is childish and unneeded. If you want to steer people away from meat, maybe write an article on the benefits of a vegetarian diet or the downsides of a meat eating one.

    4. Don't be rude or condescending to people, in general. Nobody gains anything when you act like a jerk, not you, not a cause, not the person you are offending. Nobody.

  17. lotte says:

    Are you saying that a delicious meat burrito is as enjoyably delicious as nearly four hours of sex?

    I see nothing wrong with this.