5.3
June 8, 2013

A Generation Without Role Models, in an Age of Nothing Sacred.

To live in this age is a challenge.

Without church, love, spirit, teachings, without role models, and without intimacy.

Yes, bereft of intimacy. Terrified of intimacy.

And I don’t mean the church, I mean without a church.

I don’t mean without teachers, I mean without anything worthy of being taught, nor anyone worthy of teaching it.

What were you taught, what have you learnt, and from whom did you learn it? Think about that…

No role models.

Few heroes left alive that didn’t take our dreams and trample them into the dirt.

But the truth is harder even than all that (as if all that isn’t hard enough). The truth is that to be alive today is to bear the burden of so many generations of loss, and irresponsibility, and mindlessness.

When I was a child I knew what all children know deep in their bones: that nothing in this life is not mine. That there is no part of this experience that I am not a part of and that is not a part of me. That nothing I touch ever frees itself from my greasy paw-prints, and every step leaves a footprint.

How heavily have those that ought to speak to us in whispers, truly trampled on our spirits.

How heavily have those that ought to whisper in our ears sweet truths of nothingness… how heavily have they laid upon us their loss, their abuse, their trauma.

Abuse is not something that happens to other people or that might have happened, or might happen, to you. It is happening to all of us all the time, even now as you sit reading this, because we have built a society that is abusive.

Abuse means violation and any time your rights are violated you are being abused.

Every advertisement or media that thrusts cheap, petty, gratuitous crap through your too-tired eyes, trying to manipulate and cajole you into believing that you don’t have everything you need, right now, to be happy.

To love and be loved.

Every child sold, or mis-taught, or neglected, or simply un-acknowledged.

Every ‘journalist’ who distorts, or exaggerates, or simply creates ‘news.’

Every politician who pretends to believe that corporations are people, and really believes that people are worth less.

Every doctor who exchanges “a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage.”

Every time you are sold the lie that you are anything less than an absolute miracle.

We are so surrounded by abuse that we don’t even recognize it (the wood for the trees).

Our trauma begs to be healed, begging and begging and begging. But we’ve become so skilled in the dark arts of numbness and self-deception that we’ve lost touch with our ability to see and hear the frequencies of our own light and sound.

There is nothing more tragic than wasted life.

And wasted lives are what surround us. We live in the landfill of lost time, and spend so many precious moments desperately pretending to be in heaven. Fooling not even ourselves.

We are in heaven, but it’s frequencies and subtleties and vibrations are so alien to us that we may as well be in hell.

Don’t bypass the truth. Don’t pretend that everything is perfect. Everything is perfect, but when truth is so alien that you can’t understand the perfection of truth, then all that’s left is shadows, shadows, everywhere.

We’ve gotten caught up in shadows, and lost sight of the light.

The truth is that you are pure consciousness (or God, or divine cosmic love, or spirit, or energy, or love and light, or whatever you want to call it). I call it pure consciousness. The same intelligence that keeps the planets in their orbits keeps the cells of your bodies doing what they do. Birth and death, life and love, spring and autumn, it’s all here in you. All of it, and there is nothing that isn’t. Honestly.

All knowledge, all knowing, all wisdom—in you. Now.

You are transmitter and receiver, creator and destroyer, producer and consumer, all at once, in every moment of now that ever was and ever will be.

And if you want to experience that truth directly (if you want to taste heaven and embody your own true self, fully) there is work to be done.

And because it’s what I do, I’ll tell you what work needs to be done:

We need to all of us take the time to ‘heal our hurts’. We carry many generations worth of ancestral trauma in our bodies, because our ancestors forgot their responsibility to heal. The Iroquois believe that every action must be considered in the light of its impact on the next seven generations. They are right – everything we do, or fail to do, affects our children’s children… for many generations.

In the light of Epigenetics (which has proven a link between ancestral trauma and present day disease) this belief has become a cold, hard, scientific fact.

So forget about past lives and karma. They are irrelevant right now.

What is relevant, right now, is trauma. Healing it.

Right now, and in every moment, there is a simple choice that we can make. Do we continue doing things the way they’ve been done lately, or do we take responsibility ourselves, right now, for the change that needs to be made in the world today.

If you continue doing things the same then you are part of a system that is abusive, and you are both the perpetrator, and victim of, abuse. Every day.

And that’s a gift you give your children.

Every time you choose the path of responsibility and transformation you not only take a step directly from ‘hell’ towards ‘heaven’, you also bequeath a more loving, simple, healthy world to your descendants.

It’s that important. It’s the only thing that is important.

We didn’t and don’t have role models. Let’s figure out what we missed, take personal responsibility for it, and forge ourselves into its image.

I know we can. And so do you. It’s why we’re here right now.

Please spread the love – share.

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Aug 20, 2014 12:58am

"We are in heaven, but it’s frequencies and subtleties and vibrations are so alien to us that we may as well be in hell." YES YES YES YES and HELL YES. So much truth and power of presence in this writing, Ben. It is what eats at me day and night, as well. May it NEVER stop eating at me and sending kindred spirits like you to me in SWARMS =D Each and every moment most precious. Too important to try TOO hard, 1/2 brained, living life through the scope of the media, parents, friends, the past, the future worry, and missing the LIVING, LOVING & HEALING part entirely. Far too many moments have already been wasted. The time is NOW. Thanks, Ben *GODSPEED*

Elise Aug 19, 2014 11:58pm

It is difficult to live in such a dysfunctional society. I had fairly well stepped away from society, hadn’t actually become a hermit, but it was my fondest dream.

Then I had a kid.

Now I feel I’m walking a tightrope – trying to teach her about love, true divine nature of our being while still trying to teach her how to live in this messed up world without damaging her… Is that even possible?

Of course, the answer is to fix our society. But where do we even start?

midwifemusing Jun 9, 2013 4:46pm

Wow…this resonates with me so deeply…you've touched on so many of the things that I ponder on an almost daily basis. Thank you so much for your words and the authenticity behind them.

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Ben Ralston

Ben Ralston has been practising personal development—necessity being the Mother of invention—since he was about six years old. He’s been teaching and sharing what he’s learnt along the way for a couple of decades. His main thing is Heart of Tribe retreats—whose very purpose is to help you fall back in love with life, no less. Leading these retreats alongside his woman Kara-Leah Grant—also an elephant journal writer (that’s how they met!)—they combine a deep well of lineage-based yoga teaching experience, with expertise in healing trauma and various other methods of personal development. Ben also works with clients one-on-one via Skype, writes, makes videos from time to time, and is passionate about parenting.
He lives in an intentional, tribal community in the hills of Croatia, where you might find him gardening barefoot and talking to the rocks. Connect with Ben on Facebook or YouTube or check out his website for more info.