They say the greatest act of love is letting go.
And while we don’t always choose to let the person we love go, sometimes, unexpected events or emotions cause lovers to drift apart. There comes a time in almost every relationship where lovers become lost.
Perhaps problems have descended like a heavy rain. Perhaps you’ve lost your willingness to continue and considered pulling away. Perhaps she has lost faith and thought about leaving.
Maybe you are unsure whether you should let her leave or not. Maybe you know deep down that her happiness is the most important thing to you. And while letting go feels like the best choice, it doesn’t seem like the right decision.
Although you might believe you have no other choice but to let her go, I hope you know you have the choice to keep her.
So the question isn’t if you can live without her, it’s if you can live with her.
Letting go is easy—and has unfortunately become the norm in relationships. Letting go is becoming another definition of love. Distance is becoming the new presence and silence is turning into the new communication.
The reason she’s with you is because of the men who let her go in the past. It’s because they believed in a silent and absent love. They thought love could still shine as bright through leaving. When they let her go, they weren’t aware they were letting all of her go.
The men in her past tripped at the first bump and went on to travel down a different road.
She doesn’t want you to switch roads when things get rough. She wants you to allow her to help you. Problems are perfectly normal in relationships. But they either help us grow together, or they let us drift apart—it’s up to us to make that choice.
Sometimes, we focus so much on how to love right, that we screw up and love all wrong. Instead of thinking about all the issues, think about all the miracles. Think of what makes her beautiful. Think about how your relationship can thrive and forget about how it can collapse. Envision the future with her, instead of blocking her from getting there.
It’s precisely how you’ll love her right. Love her hard, love her enough to keep her.
Don’t search for reasons to stay. Let staying become the reason. Allow your love for her to become as natural as breathing, as instinctive as an exhale.
If you wake up one morning and fail to find the faith you need to stay, relax and try again the next morning. Think of your relationship as a clear blue sky with clouds overshadowing it from time to time. Remember, the clouds don’t define your love—remember the nature of your sky.
Don’t let her go, because the moment you do is the moment you’ll realize you truly love her. Don’t wait for your aloofness to prove the intensity of your love. While you disappear into your doubts, she may already be disappearing into someone else’s arms.
If you let her go, she might meet the one who’s ready to keep her.
And know that if you keep her, she’ll choose to keep you back. She’ll hold you as fiercely as you’ll hold her. Be the man who makes a way for her in life—be the one who builds bridges and constructs staircases. Only someone whose love is fragile gets tired of fixing things when they go wrong. Don’t be that person.
Your relationship will sail on calm waters if you know how to build your ship. Then, be its invincible pirate and raise your flag up high.
Don’t mind what people tell you. Some people enjoy letting go—it’s exciting, it’s painful, it’s hopeful. Letting go means a new adventure, a new start, a new someone to love. But every start has an end, unless you choose not to write it.
When they tell you, “Love her enough to let her go,” tell them, “I love her enough to keep her.”
Author: Elyane Youssef
Image: Wikimedia Commons
Editor: Nicole Cameron