January 11, 2018

A Tool to end the Negative Self-Talk & Find Ourselves Again.

We have all struggled with negative self-talk. But, what magic happens when we pick up a pen and befriend our thoughts!

“All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.” ~ Ambrose Bierce

There is something healing in holding a pen in your hands and writing on paper. As we write down our thoughts, we are able to glance through a window into our souls, viewing our wounds—maybe for the first time—through self-compassion. When we are able to do this, we stop repeating the same negative self-talk—and the healing begins.

At some point, we stop believing in ourselves. We get stuck reliving the past. The story we tell is like a broken record, skipping over all the mistakes we have made in life. We forget that we can just pick up the needle, and the song of life will continue playing on.

Often, we struggle to really live and we begin questioning our purpose. Do we even have one anymore? We ask ourselves, “Who am I?” We start fighting the face that stares back at us in the mirror.

But, even in our darkest moments, light finds us. Our saving grace can be found by picking up a pen, sitting down with paper in hand, and finding self-compassion.

“But her story isn’t finished, and for once she’s picked up a pen.” ~ Kelsey Sutton

Through the personal reflection found in writing, we begin to to face the lies we’ve been telling ourselves. After all, we can’t hide from them when we sit down alone and write them out. Our thoughts pour out onto the paper, and as we scrutinize our own words, we are forced to face ourselves, and our disbelief in ourselves.

“Is your life story the truth? Yes, the chronological events are true. Is it the whole truth? No, you see and judge it through your conditioned eyes and mind – not of all involved – nor do you see the entire overview. Is it nothing but the truth? No, you select, share, delete, distort, subtract, assume and add what you want, need and choose to.” ~ Rasheed Ogunlaru

Learning to find compassion for ourselves—so we can stop re-writing the same old story:

Now, we must let go of the lies we believed in. It’s no longer necessary to keep living our old story. Once we’ve learned how to forgive ourselves, we can write a new one.

“Speak to yourself with compassion on the inside and you will radiate peace on the outside.” ~ Amy Leigh Mercree

When we start writing down our thoughts, it’s scary to learn what we think of ourselves. Can we stop hiding from our negative self-talk and see our own worth?

The answer is yes—it is possible to end the negative self-talk and face our innermost demons. This is how we challenge ourselves. We have to make peace with our stories so we can stop living them over and over, looking for a different result. Writing about ourselves in this way can be cathartic; it leads us down a path of self-discovery and personal growth.

Our writing must be passionate—completely unlike writing an essay for college. Once we see the words, we begin to understand how self-compassion is important to living a full and loving life. We pour our heart and soul out onto the paper, as if the words bleed from the pen. In doing so, we form a friendship with ourselves, changing our self-talk.

“We are never trapped in life, because there are constant opportunities for creativity, challenges for improvisation.” ~ Chögyam Trungpa

It can be fun to get creative with your story. Instead of re-telling a story filled with drama and negative self-talk, why not write a happy story? Through writing, we become aware of our own uniqueness, and through self-love, we add just the right color to our story. Silence the ego, and stop talking down to yourself. Instead, befriend yourself.

This time, we can write a new story—filled with brightness and truth.

“When you understand, that what you’re telling is just a story. It isn’t happening anymore. When you realize the story you’re telling is just words, when you can just crumble up and throw your past in the trash can, then we’ll figure out who you’re going to be.” ~ Chuck Palahniuk

What story are you telling the world? Join Elephant Journal Academy and change the way you see your story forever.


Author: Christina Martin
Image: Elephant Journal Instagram
Editor: Catherine Monkman
Copy Editor: Callie Rushton
Social Editor: Callie Rushton

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