January 14, 2020

Thank you Meghan & Harry for Daring to Live on your own Damn Terms.

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry are walking away from royal life for a quieter existence—and perhaps a sense of normalcy for their family.

The flurry of backlash against both of them is astonishing.

While Harry is urged to “man up,” it appears Meghan is taking heat for being a strong woman who doesn’t conform to expectations of how we think she should be as a member of the royal family. 

And as much as my beloved niece fantasized about being a royal in her youth—about being the wife of one of those two boys—I’m glad she isn’t. She is a strong, determined woman and never needed to belong to a prince to be considered a queen in her own right.

And neither does Meghan, which is why she gives me hope.

Meghan redefines what it means to be a princess, both in the monarchy and across the world.

And while I’m so tired and bored of the princess fairy tale stories of old—the helpless victim wringing her hands, waiting for Prince Charming to come rescue her and live happily ever after—Meghan offers a new princess narrative: a story about a mixed race-divorced-woman-from-a-single-parent-home. An actor, activist, and advocate rising on her own. 

She’s a true pillar of strength.

I think we forget what Meghan gave up—an aspiring career and visions of her own work. She moved to a foreign country to stand by her man, only to be impossibly compared to Kate Middleton.

Meghan is a self-made woman with her own damn money that she earned herself.

She has risen from the ashes like a phoenix from a dysfunctional family. 

She’s worked tirelessly for equality between men and women around the globe, and has stood up for young girls ever since she was one herself.

Diana broke ranks too, daring to leave the monarchy and divorce her cheating husband. She spoke openly about her inner turmoil, from her eating disorder to her crippling depression, suicidal thoughts, even admitting to throwing herself down a flight of stairs in despair. 

Likewise, I commend Harry for being brutally honest about his struggles with his own mental illness, trauma, and adjustment issues. I applaud him for taking the lessons he learned from his mom about compassion, charity, and truth above all else.

He’s thwarted the British, stiff upper lip and opened his mouth to snuff out indifference with authenticity and his own humanity. 

Perhaps Harry has witnessed the impact of enough bullies, stalkers, and creeps to understand how the public’s obsessions are dangerous to his marriage, mental health, and children. 

Knowing it was these very obsessions that led to the untimely death of his own mother, maybe losing one woman he loved was enough, so he chose to protect his family.

I respect Harry’s choice to walk the talk and honour his vows. He chose above all else to honour his life partner—not the media, or his family, or some need for public approval.

Meanwhile, Brits are up in arms and losing their sh*t over them both breaking traditions and daring to redefine normal.

As for Canadians, we are a bit passive aggressive—notoriously known for our hospitality and inclusion while whispering behind another’s back. Most of us mind our own business, but at the end of the day there are a lot of as*holes here too—there always are. No country is immune.

Even so, as a Canadian, I say welcome to this new immigrant family.

Please, let’s treat them as mere commoners ‘cause this whole royal sh*t seems highly overrated.

Meghan and Harry, may you live your life on your own terms, no crown required.

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