I know it’s a strange time to be newlyweds, but even amidst the chaos and endless searches for hand sanitizer, I find myself feeling lucky.
I’ve had a lot of time to think about this since we’ve been stuck in the middle of a planet-sized sh*t storm. I decided that I wanted to write you a letter—to remind you of some things.
I want to remind you that we are a team. It’s not your job to fix my world, nor is it my job to fix yours.
I can see how fear has etched itself into your mind and worry is crumpled between your brows. Let me kiss each crease on your forehead and remind you that you will not have to carry this weight alone. Some days you will feel weak, and I will be strong for us—some days I will feel weak, and I know you will rise up.
COVID-19 will not break us. *Read that sentence again.*
Over the years of our marriage, we will experience financial wealth and financial loss. There will be emotional highs and lows, laughter, pain, horrible holiday parties, car crashes, hormones, puppies that pee on our floor, promotions, and missed flights. Although there may not be another crisis on the scale of COVID-19 in our lifetime, it will soon be just another thing we have endured together.
Just like I said in our vows, I will not over-promise or sugarcoat things—this is a hard time. It sucks. We are nearing our one year anniversary and we will most likely still be stuck in isolation.
But, this brings me to the second thing I want to tell you—I love you.
Despite being a chatterbox with an affinity for words, I often forget to tell you that.
You know, I distinctly remember the moment we met. I remember thinking to myself, oh yeah, I’m f*cked. I also remember being struck by your appetite for the world. You had already done so much, and seen so much, and were chomping at the bit for more. You were intimidating and inviting all at the same time—all I knew was that I wanted more. I wanted to pick your brain. I hoped by sheer proximity I would inherit your tenacity and bravery in life.
You always hold yourself to a high standard, in everything that you do, and I often fall short in reminding you that you’re doing amazing. You can give yourself a break.
I’m sorry about that.
I’m also sorry for yelling at you for leaving your dishes around the house.
I’m sorry I drank all the box wine yesterday.
I’m sorry our puppy ate your favorite wool shirt.
I’m sorry I haven’t been shaving my legs.
I’m sorry I have to steal your office chair now (and I’m sorry that this will not stop).
Since we have been stuck in our 600 square foot apartment for weeks now, I think it’s safe to say that we have been through the ultimate “newlywed test.”
Have we had arguments? Sure—let’s keep it real. But, through this quarantine, I’ve been reminded that I am not only lucky to have you by my side because you check all my proverbial boxes, but because you’re my best friend in this crazy life.
I know this virus is scary, but it cannot shake our foundation.
I love you beyond measure—beyond space, and time, and literature. There are not enough words, but I will continue trying to find them.
Elephant’s Continually-updating Coronavirus Diary. ~ Waylon
How to Enjoy Life Amidst the Coronavirus Fear: Your Go-To Guide from Books to Podcasts & Wellness Practices.
What the Coronavirus is Teaching Me: 5 Lessons from Uncertain Times.
The Artist’s Stay-at-Home & Stay Sane Guide.
10 Simple Ways to Boost your Immunity without Leaving the House.