June 9, 2021

Perfectly Imperfect: How to Survive this Journey (without Losing our Sh*t).

*Warning: well-deserved cursing ahead!

Being truthful with ourselves and recognizing that we are human is the only way to survive this journey without losing our shit.

We are all striving for something, whether it is material things, happiness, love, whatever. We are striving for something, not realizing that it’s inside us—not external.

We also have this notion that there is some end game to this journey:

“When I do this, I will be happy.” “When I get that, I will be happy.” 

There is no fucking end game; the game is the journey, and someday it will end, but most of what we were striving for won’t even matter.

So when you hear “be here, now” or “live in the present,” it’s for real and not some spiritual guru talk. Because none of the other shit actually matters. What happened yesterday, the things you can’t change, the people you can’t change, and the event you are obsessing about…is over.

Tomorrow has not happened, so worrying about what could happen will drive you to insanity, and you may not come back from it. Wasting precious time worrying about things that are so out of your control—and maybe not even happening—is a sin.

We have 10 minutes to enjoy this life, so do that. Do things that make your soul sing and scream. Instead of spending time thinking about what could happen or what did happen, spend that time trying something you have never done. Or, I don’t know, maybe help someone. Fill your soul with the happiness of giving someone something they need: a hug, smile, a chat, one dollar, some food, clean clothing, or a shoulder to cry on.

Try that.

We are all very human; there is no perfect; there is no person who is always happy; there is no decision that should be made. We are perfectly imperfect, exactly how we are.

If we do not love every ounce of our imperfect soul, no amount of validation, external or internal, no toy, material item, trip, “perfect” job, or enhancement surgery will bring us any true happiness.

The truth is people that happiness lives inside us, but it is fleeting, so do not kid yourself with some belief that there are certain people out there who are always happy, content, great decision-makers, perfect parents, homemakers, coworkers, and business owners. Nope. They are perfectly imperfect, just like you.

You may not see their struggle, and they may not show you their dysfunctions. You aren’t in their everyday life; you don’t see the results of their bad decisions, the difficult marriage, the exhaustion from parenting or a lack of time.

It’s not for you to see or even know.

People struggle for reasons that you may never understand, so be patient with people as well as yourself. You do not know where they have been or where they are headed.

I have learned that there is no destination to perfection. There is only our own destination, which we define and create through our choices, lessons, and behaviors.

Be here, now. Enjoy this moment. Own your choices. Don’t listen to anyone and know that everyone is struggling. You are not alone.

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