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For over 25 years on my journey into conscious sexuality, I’ve been learning about men and male sexuality.
First, I learned through my own sexuality and sensuality, and then by spending so much time with men in a workspace.
A great deal of this space has been helping men with sexual issues, love, and intimacy issues.
I’ve worked with men who have lost their prostate through cancer, men who have lost relationships and marriages, and men who struggle with sexual issues across the board.
One of the deepest things I’ve come to see—and how much this impacts many men in so many ways—is how hard it is for us to receive.
What’s interesting is that I’ve worked with as many gay and bi men as straight and they all have the same issues.
It’s about men, all of us.
So much of our lives, as men, is based on performance—in every way.
The disconnect this causes is the separation from our hearts, the true power of our sexuality, our fire, and from the sacred feminine and sacred masculine.
We’ve been so conditioned, patterned, and deeply pressured into performing in every way.
Men are so patterned to be in control.
These patterns separate us from what resides deep within us.
One of the practices I’ve been developing to help men to soften into themselves, to receive themselves, meet themselves, is called “The Nurtured C*ck.”
It’s about receiving—not giving, not touching, and definitely not performing.
As we open to receiving, to allowing, we open to feeling, and for many men that alone is huge—to feel, to allow ourselves just to feel, and to acknowledge what we feel. Noticing everything we feel.
Sensation is the doorway to feeling.
Through touch—so gentle, so slow—we begin to feel.
The Nurtured C*ck.
Begin with a massage that connects his body to his heart.
If there’s arousal we don’t focus on it, we flow and allow it to flow through the body, bringing it back to the heart, again and again.
The c*ck massage is so slow, so soft.
In the softness, arousal becomes something different. It’s an energy that flows to the heart, through the heart.
It’s about nurturing that part of a man that has been judged, pressured, and disconnected.
You may lay your cheek on his c*ck.
You may hold him in your mouth, so softly.
There’s worship in this for a man, not for what he does, not for what he has, simply for who he is.
In this moment, he is a man.
Opening and receiving.
We see how strong we are in this receiving, in opening our hearts, in allowing someone in—deep inside.
When we allow ourselves to receive, we open the space for someone to give; there’s flow.
We become more. We expand into greater space through being able to receive. There’s more of us, and more of us to share.
Our resilience increases.
Our body releases that which we’ve held onto, sometimes generations of men whose emotional patterns we carry.
In receiving, we are nurtured.
Our c*cks are the pathway into our hearts, into our openness, into receiving—receiving ourselves.