August 6, 2021

We won’t Always be Understood or Liked & that’s Okay.



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As I continue to blog on social media, I discover more and more lessons from the challenges I feel called to share.

I have spent the last seven years on social media trying to truthfully share myself—a journey of a woman struggling, learning, growing, healed, healing, and never perfect.

I talk about post and prenatal depression, losing a child, being told by doctors I could not have children, and then having a child who was a miracle.

I share about being abused mentally and physically, not owning a house or being as wealthy as people on social media think I am because of the numbers shown on my page.

I also share about saving for three years to travel from Europe to Australia to see my family, about writing my book, having reading difficulties, and learning a second language for my visa in Switzerland.

On the other hand, I’ve noticed that social media content is also being used so that women’s photos and videos can be placed on porn sites without their permission. Women, like myself, are then shamed for the actions of the attacker. Many humans also try to empower other humans only to be pulled down by their bodies or clothing choices.

Sharing these truths about my journey online has been a gift, but I have also been further shamed for my challenges. I’ve been misunderstood and misappropriated on so many occasions that sharing has been painful and healing has been incredibly hard.

Many times I thought I was not capable because of the hate that comes from the online world, but I am so grateful to be reminded of why I keep sharing:

“Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change.” ~ Brené Brown

So many of us judge one another because we assume that we know people based on how they look. It is a sad world—a beautiful chaos of wrongs that within them hold lessons and new strengths if we choose to take responsibility for our lives.

It is a world of people continually not taking a breath to observe and hold compassion and responsibility for what they can do with whom they are and where they are. If only we all realised love isn’t liking everything someone does (or even understanding it).

Love is about choosing kindness instead of fear.

It’s about choosing to not comment when we want to say something negative, choosing to unfollow if we do not resonate instead of judge, choosing to stop shaming and comparing if we feel bad about our lives or our bodies.

It’s about choosing to find the good and celebrate it even if there are things that do not resonate with us.

It’s about choosing to hold conversations that don’t have a right or wrong ending but allow us to listen and understand there are over seven billion ways to live.

Love is not black or white, wrong or right. Not everything is meant for us, but everything is information that we can choose to use with love or with fear.

“Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.” ~ Brené Brown 

Personally, I feel I am finally learning from the challenges, rather than becoming the victim of these scared clowns and harsh experiences that make life difficult. So, this piece is for all the people who have ever felt misunderstood, misappropriated, judged, or hated for speaking their truth.

When we decide to take full responsibility for our lives, we have to accept that not everyone will understand what we’re doing or why we’re doing it—how could they?

The whole point of building awareness is not so we can continue to live a life other people approve of—it’s to live a life that brings us embodied peace and joy instead of waking up to a life we don’t enjoy.

We live in a world where we’re desperate to earn the approval of others—a world where minds are filled with adopted beliefs and lifestyles from the people around us.

Struggling souls and unhealed people aren’t always going to celebrate us for being unapologetically ourselves. People who are triggered by us will often deny us because if they are able to acknowledge the freedom we’ve worked for, they will also have to acknowledge the freedom they have not yet taken the responsibility to work for.

If we want to live the lives we were meant to live, we have to accept and embrace that we won’t always be understood or liked simply because we trigger others to recognise they have a choice too. And these people aren’t always ready to own the responsibility to change because growth is hard and this world is addicted to instant gratification.

Many people also don’t understand that healing our lives isn’t just a process of shifting our priorities or behaviour. The foundation of healing our lives is a process of healing our minds—it is recognising that everything we’re experiencing is actually bunkered down into what and how we’re thinking.

Where your mind goes, your body and life follow. And when we finally realise this, we realise that maybe the whole problem is that we’re trying to feel at ease in someone else’s world—in someone else’s beliefs or conditionings that aren’t healthy for us.

And somewhere out there, there is a beautiful soul waiting on you to start creating something new.

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