October 24, 2021

Community, Triggers & Social Media: Never Before have we had So Much Power at our Fingertips.


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Social media has opened up the world in many ways, and it also has given leniency in judging and cutting people out—mobbing and other such behaviors.

Never have we had such an opportunity to connect worldwide, and never have we had more power to judge and cut out—reject people. Oh! The power!

At some point in my personal growth, I do not explain myself or elaborate anymore. Until which time the person has a curiosity about the situation. This is me: if there is no authentic curiosity, there is no genuine desire to understand. I don’t waste my energy.

Social media and texting are the worst forms of communication, yet we love the dopamine hit we get from them. We continue! We not only continue, but we also dive all in and make it (in some cases) the only form of communication. 

We are enabling poor communication and rewarding it.

Never before have we had so much power at our fingertips. The power to connect worldwide—to experience more people—but with that, we also have the same power to “cut people out.” Dopamine hit!

If someone doesn’t like an article, it’s deleted, or we’re blocked.

Imagine a group. It’s one you’ve been a part of for three years. There are those in the group who “follow the leader”—they’ve won the popularity of the group leader. Then there are those who aren’t breaking the rules but also have not won the leader’s admiration. Unequal dynamics are playing out. Many leave due to those dynamics. It was equivalent to grade school behaviors.

I’ve seen this for years. 

In this same theoretical group, let’s say a few people read an article of yours. They offended themselves (yes, they offended themselves), and the leader felt the need to bend to those in this group complaint and allow them to call the shots. “Prevent triggers.”

That is the clique.

Kyle Cease said, “What do you have against someone hitting bottom?”

The fear of a leader to lose a few or offend a few in order to maintain the status quo rather than stand up and hold people accountable for offending themselves and risk a few leaving by giving opportunity for people to grow from the triggers instead of shooting the messenger.

The leader bent to those few. 

This is fear of disapproval. 

Those triggered had the expectation that the article’s writer was somehow flawed in their thinking and turned to blame instead of asking why they were triggered. Wanting someone outside of them to remove the strong feelings they had stirred inside.

This systemic issue of using the power of our social media to appease those who are triggered and not looking inward is also the equivalent of preventing or enabling people from dealing with their uncomfortable emotions. Maybe even hitting the bottom.

In my view, triggers are a gift. This is what I’ve come to see in my journey. This is what I’ve taught for decades. It’s an opportunity to grow and open ourselves up.

When people shut down others who’ve expressed themselves openly, after reading something through their wounded eyes, they shut themselves off from growth. Never really facing the core issue.

Leaders of groups also give off the vibe of “I can’t stand up to my members else they will disapprove and leave.” There is a need for acceptance and approval from the stronger personalities in the group. It’s not conducive to critical thinking.

We either choose to stand our ground in our ethics or bend to the whim when some get upset. This is the problem today with social media: we look for conformers. We want those who will blindly follow us—show our value in the world by agreeing with us.

Social media gives way more power than ever before.

The power that group leaders hold in social media gives way to more opportunities for a power play. It gives more opportunities for approval seeking. Where, before, we had limited opportunities, now we have billions of opportunities. Think about how much power that offers someone!

In an effort to gain thousands of followers, we feel no need to offer honest interactions. It’s too easy to brush people off with a blocking feature. It’s disheartening. It also is not growing us in a more emotionally healthy way.

Never have so many people had the power to just off someone’s head! Power, baby!

We have an opportunity to be in the arena and get our asses kicked or stay in comfort and never have hard conversations and grow. Never look at that which we judge.


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