April 15, 2022

A Reminder for When you Realize You’re Comparing Yourself to Others.


View this post on Instagram


I’ve been thinking about my computer lately.

And about how I react when he is slow (slower than I’d like).

In general, he’s good. He works well. I can do everything I need to do—like writing and basic internet searches.

But he struggles with things like Photoshop and other programs that require a stronger processer.

Over the last year or so, I’ve noticed how I get frustrated when he goes slowly, as if it’s his fault—but then it occurred to me recently: it’s not his fault.

He was not built to run these kinds of programs. It’s not his purpose.

And I knew it when I got him.

When I first decided to get the computer, I asked a coworker if he thought this one was okay. He told me it would be fine for what I wanted to use it for (writing and basic internet searches).

And it has been.

He’s good at what he does.

It’s not my computer’s fault that I eventually wanted to start using Photoshop and other programs that require more power.

He wasn’t built for that purpose. He wasn’t given the parts that would be needed for that.

But, he serves his purpose perfectly. He’s good with Microsoft Office. He’s good with the internet (so long as I don’t have a billion browsers open…which happens with work sometimes…again, not his fault).

He wasn’t built to be able to handle a billion open browsers.

And it occurred to me recently that we often do this with ourselves too. We judge ourselves based on what we think we should be able to do or based on what we see others doing. We compare ourselves and assess ourselves based on others’ abilities or what they say about us or our abilities. We allow others’ opinions of us to influence how we feel about ourselves.

But we all have our own talents, interests, and skills for a reason. No one is the same. No one will be exactly like us.

No one has been born with the exact same parts that we have.

We may not be able to do what others can in certain areas, but we’re not meant to. If we were meant to, we would have been given those parts.

But we could be serving our own, unique, divine purpose through the skills, talents, interests, and abilities—the parts—we’ve been given.

As an example, I do not love math. I did well in high school because I studied hard and had a fabulous precalc teacher—who almost made me like math! But I never loved it. I am fine at it—ahem, when I focus—but it’s not really an interest area or “strength” of mine.

So, it wouldn’t serve me to judge my mathematical capabilities to someone who is a genius in math. That just wouldn’t make sense.

It doesn’t mean I can’t use math or I can’t improve. There are a lot reasons to use math, even in basic ways, but I am not going to judge my skills or compare myself to someone who has a naturally brilliant math-leaning mind. It wouldn’t make sense.

I may be able to use math, I can improve—but it will never be a strong area for me like it is for other people who were born with the talent and interest to excel in it.

But that’s okay. It’s not really one of my parts.

And that’s not a bad thing.

I can use it in the ways that serve me and my life and my purpose.

The most important thing is that we’re true to ourselves, that we figure out what we like and love and what we’re good at—and then do those things. We can always challenge ourselves to improve in other areas, in the things we’re not naturally gifted in or that we don’t have a natural affinity for but would like to do—but we definitely shouldn’t compare ourselves or our progress in relation to others or even just outward ideals.

In general, it’s a lot better to not focus on others, but rather focus on ourselves—on nurturing and enhancing our talents and interests, on diving into what we love and into what we want to do.

It’s better we get acquainted with our own parts and use them to the best of our abilities.



Read 5 Comments and Reply

Read 5 comments and reply

Top Contributors Latest

Lisa Erickson  |  Contribution: 241,360

author: Lisa Erickson

Image: giuliajrosa/instagram