Two years ago, one of my friends told me that I always seemed afraid.

While he meant it as a helpful observation, I took it as constructive criticism. A comment that I needed not only to take to heart, but also to work towards rectifying.

The universe seemed to conspire with a message.

Shortly after that comment was made to me, I went to India on a travel seminar for my Masters of Divinity. I considered myself to be a seasoned traveler, so I was surprised by the many and varied ways my fear snuck up on me—sometimes for valid reasons, but sometimes just because I was so far out of my comfort zone.

As the rest of our class left to return to Chicago, my friend Liesebet and I stayed behind. Our professor’s parting words were, “be bold,” and those words rang in our ears for the remainder of our trip. Indeed, being bold (which inherently implies a sense of fearlessness) was our only hope of making it in India on our own. But, my fearful nature was not easily overcome, and I hardly lived into the sense of boldness my professor’s words were meant to instill.

Determined not to let fear define how others saw me, I returned to America intent on making that mantra—be bold—my intention for the rest of the year.

For the most part, I began to live it.

Slowly but surely, I took ever-deepening risks. Risks that might not seem like a lot to some people. But for someone who has lived their entire life in fear—in fear of being rejected, of not having enough money, of not being good enough, of getting in trouble (the list of fears could really go on and on)—those risks represented a huge step of living into the intention to be bold, to be fearless.

And somehow, that is how I ended up where I am today, almost three years later and perhaps more scared than I have ever been in my life. In fact, I don’t believe it would be an overstatement to say that I am downright terrified.

But I’m tired of trying to push my fear aside and pretend that it doesn’t exist.

Maybe, just maybe, it’s okay for us to feel scared sometimes. Perhaps, we should even cut each other a little slack and acknowledge that, if we’re really honest with ourselves, life is scary.

Yes, life is also full of joys and delight, but we can’t ignore that it is filled with uncertainty and hardships.

Maybe, like me, you find yourself in a new place—literally or metaphorically.

Maybe, like me, you find yourself in a place of betwixt and between, trying to start fresh on a completely new and uncharted career path.

Maybe, like me, you don’t know how long your money will keep you afloat or when more will fill your bank account.

In the many stories of fear and uncertainty scattered throughout the Bible, angels proclaim, “Have no fear.” And so, naturally, we believe we must conform to this command. But the angels wouldn’t have made this proclamation if they weren’t meeting people in really scary life circumstances where fear was a natural and primal reaction.

So how about for once we acknowledge that we’re scared, that it is okay for us to be scared and that we can wait in trepidation in the uncertainty that is life until the angels surround us with their chorus of “Have no fear, have no fear” and their message of peace swaddles us into trust and surrender.

As I wait for life to unfold and show me the next step in my journey, I choose to acknowledge my fear, to surrender into my fear. I just don’t have the energy to fight it anymore.

It’s okay to be scared.

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Relephant:

When Fear is Present: Quotes to Inspire Courage.

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Author: Elise Scott

Assistant Editor: Hilda Carroll / Editor: Toby Israel

Photo: Hartwig HKD/Flickr // Charles Harry Mackenzie/Flickr

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