October 22, 2015

Take Your Time, Baby: How & Where to Kiss a Woman. {Adult}


Roddy Keetch/Flickr 


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I remember my very first relationship—we used to not kiss for minutes or hours but days at a time. Not just kissing, but really kissing kissing.

Of course, that first relationship where we start exploring sexual pleasures is always something special and I don’t think that it necessarily needs to be like this all the time, but there is something extraordinary beautiful about taking the time to kiss.

I remember this innocent, pure energy we shared while giving each other oral pleasures but lately I’ve realised that we don’t take enough time to kiss and make love to each other with our lips, even though kissing is one of the most pleasurable things on Earth.

The most obvious way to kiss is on the lips but there are other parts of the body that would love to be touched this way too. If we are kissed all over the body and not only our main sexual parts, we are not only stimulated but feel loved. The love hormone oxytocin in our bodies increases and we connect deeper to our partner. With a deeper connection to our partner, sexual pleasures become even more intense and memorable.

Below is a list of body parts, which are looking forward to your kisses:

1. Face

Most women love to be kissed all over the face. Not licking the whole face, but softly kissing and exploring it. Kisses on the forehead, the eyes and the cheeks make us longing for more and make us feel loved, taken care of and appreciated. I love the eye area where you can even slightly suck and go all over the eyebrows and eyes. It is like making love to the face and the memory of a man making love to my face will last forever. 

2. Lips.

Kissing on the mouth is the most popular way of kissing. Don’t rush it, close your eyes often and truly feel. Change speed and be creative. Don’t cramp your jaw and tongue; leave them soft and flexible. Try to go with the flow of your partner.

A few more hints: Don’t make her grasp for breath and take your tongue out of her mouth from time to time. Kissing around the mouth is beautiful as well and you can experiment with all sorts of sucking—around the mouth, the lips and the tongue. It’s seductive to suck one of the lips and bite it tenderly. It’s incredibly beautiful and stimulating to alternate the dominator of kissing. Kiss and be kissed.

3. Ears.

It’s good to not flood them with too much saliva or to use your tongue like a drill digging for oil. If it would be possible I would suggest trying this out on yourself so you would know that it sounds like a hurricane which is not particularly stimulating or enjoying. Kissing around the ears is wonderful. Feel free to add some nice sucking and little biting of the earlobes.

Most amazing: Kiss the area directly behind the ear.

4. Neck.

Women love soft slow kisses in that area and the whole back neck area can be your playground—from behind the ears, to the spine, to the hairline and down the spine. I had a boyfriend who even went into my hair and gently bit the back of my head–incredible. The sides of the neck where you can kiss from behind the ears to the shoulders are super sensitive and receptive to your kisses. Or you could kiss the neck from the spine down to the shoulders and simultaneously pull the hair and of course kissing downwards the spine gets you to my next point.

5. Back.

I don’t know of a woman who doesn’t love to be kissed on the back. This is probably the area where almost everything is stimulating or soothing. Feel inspired to kiss the whole back with brief or long kisses accompanied with gentle sucking and licking. You’ll figure out what your woman loves most by reading her body and sound language. Combine the kissing with some stroking and squeezing of the back or you try running your fingertips up and down the back.

Be aware of the sides, women can be ticklish there. If you want to end up laughing in bed it’s worth a try. A classic route would be to kiss from the head all the way down the spine. 

6. Butt

Grab it, kiss it, lick it in every pleasurable way. We love it. And just a hint: don’t be afraid to use your tongue. 

7. Breasts. 

Kissing and sucking the nipples is great as long as they are not the only ones getting attention. Make it a game to go around the nipples with your fingers, hands, tongue and mouth to see what excites us the most. To just kiss the décolleté first and then go in the direction to the top of the hill or mountain can be more seductive than to just go with the helicopter straight to the top. 

8. Stomach.

Similar to the ears, you should probably not flood the bellybutton. Kiss around it and please don’t hesitate to go a bit lower to our waist and hipbones. Kisses a little above the hip bones can drive some of us crazy. Besides kissing, it’s oh so hot to run your tongue down the stomach to the mound of Venus.

9. Holy lips.

This would fill several articles on it’s own but here are some general hints: using your tongue and and a little sucking is wonderful. Try alternating between a soft and a hard tongue. Start softly and slowly. Make your lips as big as possible and start licking in from the bottom up to the clitoris and lick the inside of the lips. You can even use your hands to get there. Try sucking the clitoris and using your tongue to do little circle. And yes, put your tongue inside.

10. Hands and feet.

I know most women love a good foot massage that constitutes of little kisses on the feet too . There was one guy who was really crazy about my feet and could indulge them for hours—it was very special and I loved it. If you have an urge to do it, go for it and don’t forget about the hands. 

Bonus track: Kissing the whole side from bottom to the top.

If the woman lies on her side just go from the bottom of her leg all the way up to the armpit, kissing the side of her leg, her hipbone, the side of her upper torso and continue to kiss along her arm. These are areas that do not get enough attention but it certainly feels nice.

If you think it’s weird to give detailed advise in this area because every woman is unique, you are definitely right. In fact there is just one main advice: Go with your feeling and take your time. Come from the heart and really feel your woman. Make her feel loved. Make her whole body feel loved.

Taking the time to kiss the whole body makes it possible to connect with each other on a deeper level which simultaneously takes our sexual life on a whole new level as well. Our capacity to give and receive love increases with every kiss.

Take the time to fully enjoy what you are sharing in this moment. Don’t hesitate to slow down and pay attention to little signs like pulling you closer and moaning. Making love to the whole body is a completely different level to just having sex.

I think our world could benefit greatly from more kissing. The way we are used to kissing is kind of symbolic: we often tend to only kiss particular parts and don’t care about the rest. Every part of the body loves to be kissed just like every being needs love.

Kissing—tender, delightful, sensual, playful and loving—is one of the best ways to show and receive love.

Mmm, now I feel like kissing. Not kissing, but, you know, kissing kissing.


Kissing: a Tutorial.

What to look for in a partner:


Author: Christine Stein

Editor: Katarina Tavčar

Photo: Roddy Keetch/Flickr


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