August 31, 2019

To the Self-Sacrificing Women who Give Away their Power.

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” ~ Lucille Ball


To the girl who has molded herself, time and time again, to fit the image of who others wish she could be.

To the girl who is willing to move mountains in order to make the people she loves happy, sacrificing her own well-being in the process.

Who has gone to extreme lengths to take responsibility for other people’s feelings.

Who has bent over backward to keep the peace in friendships and relationships, to “make it work,” with hopes that—in someone else’s eyes—she will finally be seen as lovable, worthy, and good enough.

Who, when conflict arises, has chosen to stay quiet, calm, and apologetic, out of fear of how others may react if she were to speak up—not realizing the real and impending dangers of this behavior.

Who has given those she has loved the power to destroy her, and has consequentially been destroyed, but has also healed, rebuilt herself, put the pieces back together, and found her inner strength.

Who has realized a painful and cutting truth time and time again: no matter how much you change, adjust, accommodate, try to be “better,” try to please, try to impress…sometimes it’s simply not enough. Sometimes it’s not mutual or reciprocal. Sometimes it’s not about you.

Once you feel the need to prove your worth to someone, you’ve already forgotten it.

Find your strength.

Allow heartbreak to be the dirt and sorrow to be the rain for more beautiful things to grow in your life—I promise you, they will.

Ask yourself, “What do I want?” As simple of a question as that is, it can be easy to forget the answer to that.

Rather than molding yourself to fit someone else’s standards, mold yourself to fit your own.

Learn more. Experience.

Be loving and patient with yourself.

Try something scary and exciting. Get out of your comfort zone.

Make beautiful plans.

Help someone who is dealing with far worse.

Love and accept yourself, while still working at becoming the best person you can be.

When it comes to relationships and friendships, never let anyone take advantage of you, try to hurt you, hide you, or allow you to feel “less than.”

Surround yourself with people who love, support, challenge, encourage, and accept you.

When it comes time, allow love to consume you and lose yourself in the tight embrace of another.

We all long to belong, to be valued, to be loved, but the trick is learning how to do so without sacrificing oneself in the process.

You are enough. You have value, and your love has value.


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