July 13, 2020

To the Broken Mom who finds Strength for her Kids.

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Have you ever been in an unhealthy relationship and kept turning a blind eye until you saw that your kids were seeing it, too?

Have you ever been the mom who’s found herself thinking, “They can put me through anything, but the second my kids get involved, the game changes?”

Have you ever let someone take advantage of you, mistreat you, disrespect you, and didn’t think to cut them out until that treatment did extend to your kids?

Have you ever walked away, full of fear for the unknown, because all you knew was that you had to?

I see you.

If you’ve ever been heartbroken for lost dreams or had your mind screaming, “What if I can’t do this?” I see you.

If you have ever sat in a chair, with life all around you, not knowing how to keep living it, I see you.

If you have ever sat in bed, tears streaming down your face, thinking maybe it would be best if I weren’t here; if in that moment, your eyes and thoughts to darted toward your babies and you have kept going because deep down you knew that without your existence—no matter how broken and “useless” you feel—they would be even more broken without you, I see you.

If you have ever woken up thinking, “If it weren’t for my kids…”

I see you walking away for them.

I see you holding on for them.

I see you protecting them.

I see you putting everything you have into them.

And no matter how much being in these situations makes you feel like a bad mom, no matter how much guilt you have for being “there” in the first place, or for not getting up sooner, this is how you know you are a good mom:

You’re finding that tiny crumble of strength and holding onto it for dear life because your kids need you to. Your kids inspire you to be better, they give you a reason to hold on—to keep trying. And you do.

I see them breathing life into you, tapping you into that mom strength that appears to come from thin air—a strength that sometimes you cannot see.

I see you. I am you.

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