January 12, 2021

How to Forgive, Release & Not Necessarily Forget.

“Sometimes the worst things that happen in our lives put us on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.” ~ Author Unknown


Life is a funny thing.

We are faced with choices daily. We face the consequences of those choices. Some of them last a long time and some are over quickly.

In some cases, we have control over what happens in our lives, but in others, we don’t. The point to remember is how we respond to things we have no control over—it determines the end result.

Bad things happen. Bad things happen to everyone. For a lot of us, our lives are about responding to the stimuli or events as they occur in our lives. For others, they set goals, have a plan, have a dream, so when bad things happen, they are able to step back, adjust their focus, and work out a solution to the “problem.”

Choose to look at the bigger picture and see the possibility you have with different choices.


In my line of work, one of the most common phrases I hear is, “I just can’t forgive.”

Here’s the thing, though: forgiveness isn’t for them. It’s for you. Does it change what happened? No. Do they deserve forgiveness? Probably not. Should you do it anyway? Yes—especially if you want to move forward with your life.

When we don’t forgive someone or hold a grudge, we are literally running the race of our lives with our head turned the wrong way, focused on the thing that went badly in our lives. Have you ever seen a runner looking backward as they run? It becomes a trip hazard. If we’re running on the road, our bodies will start to go on an angle, potentially into oncoming traffic.

When we don’t forgive, we are holding onto that experience, event, or person, and that bond will not be removed until we forgive them and release it to the universe.

Powerful things happen when we release it. Should we forgive and forget? No. Don’t forget. Don’t dwell on it either, but remember enough of the lesson that we keep our boundaries strong around the people involved and we can protect ourselves.

Remember the lesson. Don’t open the door back up to be hurt again.


Releasing the experience, event, or person to the universe after forgiving them helps us to move forward with our life.

We literally open ourselves up to what the universe wants for us. The universe wants to work with us and through us. It doesn’t want to allow life to happen to us. Releasing the bad stuff, the negative energy, and experiences to the universe opens the pathway or channel for positivity and good things to come through.

Releasing the things holding us back allows us to begin setting goals and moving forward in our life, into what the universe has for us.

If the universe wants to work with us and through us, how can it do that when we’re busy holding onto the past? Why would the universe give us what we’re asking for, when we’re so busy looking back, playing the blame game, or playing the victim?

It is okay to feel the feelings when bad things happen—it is actually really important. Acknowledge the situation and associated feelings. Just don’t stay there. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and put one foot in front of the other, so you can release that and keep moving forward.

Release the person or situation with love, and if you feel like you can’t release them with love because what they’ve done is so horrendous, then utilise the universal love—the universal energy of love and the universe will stand in for you and help you to release that thing, so you can move forward.

Anytime an experience or a situation crops up that turns into a negative experience, we have a choice—react or respond. If we find ourselves reacting, stop. Take a deep breath and ask why we are feeling triggered by this situation. Choose a different path.

We all have choices in our lives. Everything is a choice. Making no decision is still a decision—it is allowing the universe to choose for us. Stand up. Choose you. Choose for today to be better than yesterday. Choose to move your life forward. Draw a line in the sand, and choose for you, for your future. Choose to be positive.

Focus on what you desire in this lifetime so that you can look past all the things that may hold you back.

An Invocation

Dear Universe,

I acknowledge that I may not have always made the best decisions. I have lived the consequences of my decisions, and today, I stand here and I choose me.

I choose my future. I choose to set goals and be the best version of myself. I choose to be me, I choose to move forward, and take action in my life so that I can have the best outcome for myself and those who are important to me.

I choose to be a role model to my children and to those who watch what I do.

I forgive and release with love anyone or anything that crosses my path with the intention to hold me back. I release that part of me that doesn’t believe in me. I release anything from my past, past lifetimes, present and future, including future lives, through my entire lifeline—past, future, and anything that does not serve me and my passion and my purpose.

I choose me. I choose life. I choose to be positive, and I choose it now.

I release, I release, I release anything that does not serve me, and I thank you for showing me when I am making a choice that will affect me in a way that I don’t need.

I choose to be me. I choose to put me first so that my cup is full, so I can fill the cups of those around me.

I choose to love, respect, and honour myself and what feels good and aligned in me. I choose that which resonates in me, and I choose it now and in every moment in my future path. I embrace the power of the universal energy of love to help move my life forward.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. And so it is.

So here it is, the line in the sand. Will you step over it, to move into your purpose and your passion? Will you move forward and stop looking back? It’s up to you.


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