April 16, 2021

The Things I tell Myself in Times of Uncertainty.

Dear Sarah,

I know this is hard.

I know you feel as if you are not doing enough, that you are not enough. You feel as if you should be light-years beyond where you are right now.

All of that is a lie.

I want you to breathe into this moment. Feel this time in space, and allow yourself to be there. Tell those voices that say to you that you are a failure for not knowing that they are no longer needed. Thank them for their service and release them. Allow them to take a backseat on this one.

I want you to pause.

I want you to breathe again into the present moment. Feel your seat on your chair. Feel your body taking up space in the room. Feel the breath reaching down into the very center of your being; this is where the work is. Your mind is going to say, “You need to ‘figure it out.'” It is going to tell you that you need to have an “answer” and that drive is not going to get you where you want to go.

The pause is going to give you what you are truly looking for. The not-doing. The being. That is where your work is. It is not out there. It is in here.

I know you want to push, drive, analyze. I get it. It is hard to sit in uncertainty. After all, you are only doing this because you desire the best future for yourself. You desire to put yourself in the direction that will open your life rather than close it down. But no amount of “doing” will get you there.

You need to make room for the pause. For the contemplation. For the surrender. I know it seems so counterintuitive to what society preaches you must do. “Chase your dreams!” “Make it happen!” “Visualize success and it is yours!” Those messages are floating around your head and pushing you when pause is needed.

Wisdom does not move that fast. Wisdom moves like the delicate rustle of willow branches in the breeze. The branches allow themselves to be moved exactly where the wind moves them. They are not worried if the wind is coming or not. They are not analyzing the direction they’re taking. They simply move. If you truly want to open your life, open to the pace of rest. Open to the wisdom of nature.

And when you feel you need to act, surrender again. This is not a job for your mind. Allow uncertainty to be what it is right now. And know in this moment, you are complete.

Nothing is needed, and everything is as it should be.

You are doing just fine.
The answers will come.
The path will reveal itself.
Your life will unfold.

Until then…rest. While time unfolds around you, allow yourself to soak in the beauty of now. And know that no matter what, love never leaves.



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