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This kind of conscious romantic relationship is not for everyone.
But, if you really want to know love and peace, then it is the ultimate tool—life is the workshop!
The real purpose of a conscious, romantic relationship is to facilitate the inner marriage of the divine masculine and feminine principles within us.
We do this to transform our inner selves from its fragmented state—a state which will be largely the result of childhood wounds and trauma. To a place of unity and to bring us home to the truth of who or what we really are, beyond this human experience.
The human journey is to transcend duality; when the two become one. This is one way that we potentially realize our true divinity while still in human form.
A twin flame is a partner who we meet in order to do this work of self-actualization.
The main difference between a twin flame and another conscious relationship is that it will be an even more fast track, catalytic, intense ride than most relationships. The intensity of the ride will be determined by your readiness, willingness, and commitment to becoming the best possible version of yourself. By asking yourself how much you really want to come home and alchemise union and wholeness within? They say that relationship is the highest form of yoga and the twin flame version certainly is.
The common understanding of twin flames is based upon a limited spiritual perspective of the nature of life, reality, and relationships. Most people seem to think that your twin flame is (just) someone external to you, and that meeting them and having a relationship with them will bring completeness, peace, and happiness; the idea that a soul was split in two and reunion with your other half will result in perfect love.
My experience is that twin flames have the potential for a deeper love, beyond the shallow and misguided information about human love that we have been given, to the possibility of remembering that we are the embodiment of love but we fell asleep to this knowing. I speak of a love more profound than we ever thought possible but not attained in the traditional, codependent, Hollywood, romantic relationship way. The true potential of twin flame is for divine union within both people and the opportunity to realize union with The Great Mystery; the transcendence of duality while in human form.
There are many potential twin flames, many people whose wounds are interconnected with our own, and life will bring us the perfect twin flame for our growth when the time is right.
In my case, the death of my mother as a baby meant that I was reluctant to trust women, to allow them in, or to open my heart, because I was scared that they would abandon me and leave, as my mother had done, and that this would be too painful for me to experience again. So, my ego always tried to keep me at a safe distance so that I would not suffer the pain again. By not committing fully and constantly trying to highlight faults and reasons why I should not trust and give myself fully to the relationship, my ego was attempting to keep me safe but I was alone still.
My twin flame’s response to her childhood trauma was to shut down, to opt out emotionally, or actually physically leave me. This behavior repeatedly triggered my own wound until I was able to transform it by staying in the transformational fire of loving relationship with myself, life, and my partner.
By this I mean staying with the feelings while choosing empowering thoughts based on the current circumstances alone, rather than emotionally fueled by unexpressed past emotions. In this way, all that was not in alignment with being my best possible self was, over time, transformed. For her part, she has now learned to stay present even though at first this was terrifying for her. For both of us, this meant consistently choosing to respond differently to situations as they arose. Reacting as a conscious man/woman, rather than a wounded child, is one powerful way we can dissolve outdated timelines and heal wounds. And this is the purpose of a conscious twin flame relationship.
We are here to learn. If we understand the true nature and purpose of conscious twin flame romantic relationships we can surrender more fully to the roller-coaster ride and not take so much notice of the voice inside our heads that says, “I’m sure that relationships were supposed to be sweeter and calmer like in the movies, perhaps I need to get out of here!”
Whether you stay with your twin or go doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things. Because whatever is unhealed within, you can either resolve in this relationship or the next one that you find yourself in.
Our external reality is but a reflection of our internal world and it doesn’t matter how hard, or long, or far you run—you can’t run away from yourself. Believe me, I know!
Twin flame inner work is not for the faint of heart. But the growing feelings of love, peace, and contentment with another have made it all extremely worthwhile. This is the purpose, the power, and magic of a conscious, romantic twin flame relationship.