It started last week…
The sadness, the body pains, the migraines.
It lasted for 10 days.
Every year at this time, my emotional stability takes a nosedive.
I live in southern Ontario, Canada. As we move away from summer and enter fall, it makes sense that our inner Self must shift as well—does it not?
We move from a fire season into a water season, an emotional season, a shadow season.
As someone who has faced traumas, as so many of us have in our lifetimes. I have been working on healing myself and others through Reiki for 10 years now, and I know that turmoil feels so unsafe and so gut-wrenching.
What this year is teaching me is that there is more room to love myself, there are more people who need to be disposed of from my life, and there is a need for organization so that my meditation and Reiki practice do not suffer.
There is room to respect myself even more.
As seasons shift and change every three months, so do we. With every experience and every action, joy, pleasure, pain, or sorrow there is room for deeper communication between you and your soul—your Self is what I call it.
The true Self, the one that lives with childlike wonder and views the world as a beautiful masterpiece of intricate and simplistic design. The Self that does not worry about failure or time spent. The Self that moves forward and perseveres no matter what. That is the shift I am looking forward to.
Last weekend I spent five hours crying in my bed on Saturday night. My partner, the angel that he is, was at a friend’s house and messaged me to see how I was and to see if I needed him to come home. I am grateful for his support, but I knew I needed to be alone—to cry, to let it all out—so I said no, please stay out, and have fun.
This cry was for all of the things I knew I needed to let go of but didn’t want to. It is so much easier to stay the victim, but, I am so not about that life.
Messages this fall that are taking me into lessons learnt and lessons I am still learning:
1. It is okay to change paths.
2. It is okay to drop people from our lives.
3. It is necessary to let ourselves have alone time.
4. Failure is not the end.
5. Not everyone’s intentions are pure, and that is okay—just pay more attention to your intuition.
6. Trust yourself above all else and take time to make decisions.
7. There is no rush.
8. Change is good. Change is needed.
9. Be like the trees and let that which is no longer needed fall to the forest floor.
10. Surrender to the process and believe in yourself above all else.
I hope as these seasons change and we enter the season of grief in the northern hemisphere, that you give yourself the time and space to grieve all of that which you are no longer. I hope you let yourself grieve the relationships that are no longer. I hope you love yourself, your body, and that you find ways to have more fun.
I will be in meditation, reading, and basking on the forest floors.
Be in love sweet friends—you are loved.