June 27, 2021

The Yoni & Lingam Meditation of Gazing—& How to Practice it with your Partner.

The Yoni or Lingam meditation of gazing is looking with and through the eyes of your heart.

It’s a meditation on loving, accepting, and acknowledging—in the giving and in the receiving.

It’s a meditation on presence—sexual presence, heart presence, body presence.

It’s a meditation where we bring our heart into our gaze, where the vision within the vision is one of love.

It’s a meditation where we open ourselves to receive, to be seen.

There is deep healing in the giving, deep healing in the receiving. Healing through being rather than doing.

It’s a meditation of stillness.

It’s a meditation of intimacy.

It’s a meditation of dropping into ourselves, of meeting, of being met, in the quiet of being who we are.

It’s a meditation where there is no time other than the moment and this breath.

It’s a meditation of awareness in the vast space beyond thought.

The Practice

It begins by creating a warm space, a sanctuary, with whatever elements are important to you.

Sit opposite your lover.

Breathe, breathe into your heart.

Drop into your heart, feel the texture, feel the space of your heart.

Bring the energy of your heart to your eyes so that what you see, you see with your heart. This makes your gaze palpable; it gives it energy.

Bring your eyes to the eyes of your lover.

Allow yourself to be seen as you look into their eyes.


Lie your partner down, making sure they are supported as they need to be comfortable.

Sit between their legs, making sure you are as comfortable as you want to be.

Rest your eyes on their heart center, in the middle of their chest.


Slowly travel your eyes down their body to their yoni or lingam. 

And see with your eyes, with your heart.

Look at every fold, every rise, every curve, every crease. Travel with your eyes over the landscape of their genitals. Touch them with your eyes, caress everything that you see.


Breathe into presence.

Breathe into your eyes, into your heart, breathe into their body.

See how their yoni or lingam and heart are connected.

See how their skin is continuous throughout their body.

Look into your lover, into their sex, through their sex to the divine sex of their body.

Lingam of Life, yoni of Life.

As you lie back to receive, open yourself.

Open your heart, open your body.


Feel into whatever arises—feeling, sensation, emotion.

Present in your body.

Allow yourself the gift of receiving, of being seen.

You offer your body, your beauty to your lover, as they offer their gaze to you.

Allow yourself tears, arousal, shame, openness—everything that’s there. Breathe into it.

Breathe into wanting to close and hide.

Breathe into wanting to open, so they can see your soul.

Breathe into your yoni, into your lingam.

Breathe into becoming hard, becoming wet.

Breathe into wherever it takes you.

There will be a time where this is complete for now.

Withdraw your gaze slowly, as you would your touch.

Come back to your heart, to your body.

Ask your partner what they need. Maybe to be held, maybe to be caressed, maybe to be pleasured, maybe to make love, maybe to lie together, maybe to talk.


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